“The first step to shedding this mask is, in a way, just embracing that fact. Just give yourself enough gut-check moments about the kind of behavior you see around you. It isn’t enough to see it; you’ve got to see it and then have a reaction that’s more critical than complimentary.” – Lewis Howes
Honestly, your true friends don’t give a damn about how “alpha” you are. All it takes is for a male to say that “one time” and I’ll switch him off and can him in no-time. Alpha Males honestly pile a lot of pure pressure on their peers. I saw my brother succumb to pure pressure back in 2000 when his friend, Brandon, told him to spoke a cigarette. When I saw him smoking a cigarette, I was amazed. What is this 14-year-old kid doing smoking a cigarette; let alone he’s my brother.
Now that I think of it, all of these alpha males my brother is or was friends with ultimately took him down a path he never wanted to go down. There was a Puerto Rican, ego-maniacal friend my brother had by the name of Raf who would constantly demean me because I was the “younger” one. The other friends my brother had at the beginning of his young adulthood had already committed crimes, or they were into drugs, smoking weed and playing videos games all day. What my brother thought was “cool” was a disease he was slowly drowning himself in.
Now that you know the situations, now it’s time to breakdown what you can actually be free of if you remove this mask.
Being the hero who lifts others up
The joy of being in service
Empowering others around you
Letting go of being in control
Deeper sense of love
“Work for win-win scenarios in every possible circumstance. Use your energy to win and empower others to win. Instead of looking for things that separate us, look for things that unite us. Instead of looking for evidence that your way is the only way, try other people’s ways. Listen, connect, and hear other people’s ideas. A true leader doesn’t need to be right in order to feel worthy; he is able to see the best idea from anyone and bring it to light.”
Excerpt From: Lewis Howes. “The Mask of Masculinity.” iBooks.
What does winning mean to you? What does losing mean to you? If you look at all the NFL players, they’re obsessed with winning and hate losing. Losing is the greatest part of life…and this is how a lot of them are sucked into wearing the Alpha Mask.
I lose everyday in Thailand. I lose at getting the typical passerby’s respect. That’s my loss, and I love it. I’m a man who’s not afraid of showing his emotion. When I cross the line at the Spartan Beast later on this year, I will cry. I’ll go on Instagram stories and show my emotions to the world, too. That doesn’t make me any less of a man than Ray Lewis. Your self-worth shouldn’t be wrapped up in winning.
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